What special things did you do with your father?
OUCH!! Okay, if I want this to be an honest thing I will have to answer this question. I still haven't answered the wedding question, and am not wanting to look back at that. And here I am with a question I do not in any way want to face.
I have a father and a dad. My father left when I was little. That's not to say he didn't do anything with me... just not things I'd really want to write about. He used to feed me shots of whiskey and some sort of pickled fish when we were over there. I think that was my first memory of him (other then sitting in the car while he was in the bar) Then he molested me but those memories are just beginning to come back and I will save that for therapy.
As far as my step father goes, I didn't like him at first, didn't trust him. So when I was at home all his attempts to get close to me failed. I believe now I didn't trust him because of what my father was doing to me. Then I remember hearing him telling my mother that he didn't think my father should see me anymore. (not that he was seeing me on a regular basis anyway just when he saw fit) I blocked so much out, not just the abuse but everything around it... even the good stuff. I do remember my step dad playing with us and me fighting it. Then one day things came to a head, we had a screaming match. I told him I hated him, he would never be my father. He looked relieved. I guess being my father is something he didn't want to do. He wanted to be my dad. After I moved out we became close, he took me fishing a lot, took me ice fishing for the first time... I stood on the ice scared to death I was going to break threw. It was fun. He now defends me against my mother... not many people have the guts to do that. I'm glad I gave him a chance.. I just wish I hadn't waited so long. As for my bio father.. he's dead, I am making progress in forgiving him... if I don't forgive him I'll never grow, the pain will never end and I'll never stop having problems because of it. I still have a long way until I accomplish that but I'm on my way.
I can't believe I'm willing to share this, not sure if it's the best idea or not. I usually like to keep this stuff private. Maybe it's a good thing.... maybe not.
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12 comments:
Camping, white water rafting, i flew down to north carolina myself 3 times to visit my father and step mom -all when i was younger. We're not close! My grandfather was my father figure!
Hey promise are you my twin . I wasnt going to answer this either so i was reading yours. Um thats the same thing I would of answerd .shots of whiskey at 7 and well the other thing until I was 15 . Im sorry .I can honestly say I know how you feel its good to get it out .
I think it's a good thing. It always helps to talk about these things. I'm sorry you had to go through that Promise. If only God had given us a magic wand, huh?
Love ya darlin!
God bless ya too!
Lahoma
ummmm, not much...
I dont have alot of fond memories of my dad.
But some are going fishing, camping, etc.
Here ya go! No camping involved with this answer. lol ~Colleen :)
I had to wait three days to come up with something...but I ended up having a lot of fun writing this one!
http://journals.aol.com/jamie24601/QuizMe/entries/397
Jamie
Promise, I'm sorry about the way your "father" was. I must have been one of the lucky ones. My father did a lot with us. He went to high school events and got involved in high school events with us. We had a lot of fishing tripsto local lakes and streams. We went camping alot of summers on cross-country trips. He rarely drank around us and never more than a can of beer or two. He was involved in our scout troop. We still have Thanksgiving and Christmas at his house. I was lucky and sometimes didn't realize how lucky I was.
I still have fond memories of playing checkers with my father when I was very young. This is actually when I first started drinking coffee too since I made the coffee for him and I decided to have some too. I couldn't figure out what the attraction for coffee was except that it was nice and hot. My father always won the checkers game - except once - and that was because he was falling asleep. That was the only time I ever won a game with him!
Rose
http://journals.aol.com/roseb44170/RosesJournal
Here's mine!
http://journals.aol.com/missboogerhead/MissOsSoapbox/entries/794
~Miss O
Fishing and swimming in the old swimming hole!
http://journals.aol.com/helmswondermom/LorisJournalJar/entries/464
Lori
It's a good thing! :)
~j
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